Keep it Real Wednesday
July 20, 2022
What have I learned (Part 2, Forgiveness)
Lessons from Rosemary, Part 2
Forgiveness
Those closest to me know that I can be one to hold a grudge sometimes. It’s something I am actively working on and a work in progress.
But my mother was the opposite. Rosemary was a very forgiving person and allowed people the grace of making mistakes in life and providing forgiveness.
Before she passed away, a friend recommended that I have a conversation with Rosemary to make sure there was nothing left unsaid. This friend (thank you Laurie) gave me a few talking points of questions to ask my mom which would spark meaningful conversation.
One of the questions was: “What can I forgive you for?” and another “Can you forgive me for (insert whatever that is)?”
I thought about this a long time and then one day approached my mom as I was seated next to her on the couch.
I said “Mom, can you forgive me for the times I could have been more patient this year as a caregiver, for the times when the stress affected my tone, words and actions?”
My mother grabbed my hand and looked at me as we locked eyes and said this:
“Jill, I forgive you for anything you THINK you need forgiveness for NOW or in the FUTURE”.
In essence, my mother blessed me with a blanket of forgiveness. She provided a way to dismiss those future momentary regrets and disappointments in ourselves that circle around in our minds after we lose someone close to us.
That’s how she lived her life.
Thank you, Mom, for providing a living example of forgiveness.